Love actually creates problem. It really happened with Sonam who is a government employee in the capital of Bhutan. I interviewed her and here is what she feels…
Me: Please, can you introduce yourself and about your life?
Sonam: I am Sonam, a government employee working currently in the capital. I too am the victim who had to really suffer due to the love inventory in my life. The young stage in my life was actually really enjoyable where I was being cared by the elders and I too had to care my younger too. The life being a girl during the initial stage was really challenging where with the each stage the care and the problem must be increased in the life of the girls. The educational institution was in my village and where later to the eastern side of Bhutan.
Me: Can you narrate me how you encountered him/her? And what made you to think to be with him/her?
Sonam: I had the first boy friend in my life. Actually we too loved each other but due to the intervention of parents and other relatives looking at the personalities of that boy and his family I had to leave him. The other reason is he was unfaithful for me where he had other girl friends for several times. The love between us never mattered where his background was unacceptable. And I had to go with the words of my parents. Later I had met the present husband encountered in the call. He was in service for several years and actually we had to spend almost two years studying each other. The love increased between each other day after days. Actually to tell frankly, the faith brought us together. I actually never looked for his post or he being in the job. The love actually mattered for me.
Me: What is your opinion on love and life?
Sonam: Love and life actually is just the same. No matter what so ever love actually matters in my life. If there is love, the stage of life becomes so smooth and fruitful. But the love must be true from both the sides; i.e. from the boy and a girl.
Me: Do you have any contradictions on love and life?
Sonam: The life before the intervention of love was actually serene. I have to think none other than about the life. After I got with the relationship I had to think about all the consequences in the both sides. I too had to think about happiness and goodwill of my boy. Actually the true love between my first boy friend decreased when he acted unfaithful for me.
Me: What type of challenge came in your life?
Sonam: The actual challenge in my life was the difficulties in my love relationship. It was all because of the intervention of the parents and relatives between two of us. The difficulties were due to the definition of wealth and position of the bride by the parents. The challenge actually for me was due to the mischievous actions by my first boyfriend where I had to struggle so much even to control my emotions.
Me: How you feel your life now?
Sonam: Actually the feelings of sadness occur for not listening to my parents. The life is satisfied now. I can live my life happily now. No misunderstandings occur between me and my husband.
Me: Actually, who do you blame for the misunderstandings?
Sonam: The blame actually goes to my parents and the relatives. The problems occurred all due to their interventions. The blame goes for them because I listened for them for the first time and later I thought I too have to decide my life. The actual situation went worse when my sister took me with her and told me to give a job. I had to spend almost one year and six moths with her. It was really a tough time for me to even be with my relatives being a girl without any job. I thought it might be better for me to marry the one who loves me rather than thinking about my parents. Actions of the relatives changed when I had to reside for so long without a job. Hesitation always occurred even if they give me money or even a food.
Me: How have you overcome the misunderstandings?
Sonam: I struck towards one side that is towards my husband. I too even was unable to inherit the land and buildings of my parents. It was all because both of us .i.e. my husband and myself signed an agreement to even take out my census out from my family. The true love actually mattered to overcome the misunderstandings.
Me: During the challenges, how did you prove yourself to be true to your partner?
Sonam: I left even my relatives and ran away leaving all the relatives behind. The hurtings on my foot and body was nothing when we ran away. We ran towards my husband’s brother. All his families and friends helped us during all the hardships. The similar thinking really matters when in those type of problem.
Me: How were reactions of your partner during the difficulties which made your mind to realize that he/she is the true partner for you?
Sonam: Actually it was due to when he took my situations. He took all my problems, my misunderstandings and other irrelevant actions into considerations. He never thought badly on me though all the problems occurred due to my relatives. The other thing is he never even uttered a bad word to my relatives though they told all unbearable words for both of us.
Me: Did you have any insight of the present situation during the times of difficulties?
Sonam: Yes, I actually had an insight of my present life. It was all because he was only the one to console me when I was in the really unbearable situation. He understood all my feelings. But the thinking for me to suffer later still occurs in my mind. When the same problem occurs with the other well being it is really tough for me to recollect my problems. The unbearable past situation of mine is really into the nerves of me when I see the similar problems being occurred with other well-beings.
Me: What if the same situation happens to your child? How will you react?
Sonam: Realizing to the situation occurred to my life I will tell nothing. But being the child of my own blood I too have to study the details of the one that may like or love my child. If the conditions of the boy or a girl who may love my child is acceptable to me and if my child understands what I feel I will advise her/him. But for sure I will never see the situations i.e. background of that girl or guy, the positions or the physical appearance.
Me: Do you have any advice for the young lovers?
Sonam: It is really important for all the young lovers to study the details of the other. It should be made sure that the feelings from both the lovers are same and true. The slight difference between the feelings of the two will really create unbearable situation like mine. Sometimes the situation comes when we think even to leave our life. But what I suggest for the young lovers is to really study each other. It is the tough situation when we cross the road.
Me: Thank you, madam for giving me an opportunity to know all your feelings. Thank you.